That is all well and good, and I understand you can't change the world overnight, nobody would reasonably expect such. But none of that excuses rudeness or treating members like second class citizens when they disagree with the company line. When that attitude comes out of the leadership, there is a problem that goes way beyond the mechanics of policies. Until that changes, everything else is just fluff.
There are people that have violated the trust of their position repeatedly only to get promoted later. I have seen polices and procedures completely blown off at the highest level, and then turned right back around and thrown in someone's face later on. You cannot beat someone up with the CoC and CoR and then ignore it later on because in one person's judgment following the rules would not have changed the outcome of the situation, it reeks of hypocrisy. You can't have a healthy network when the offenders have more rights than the people trying to get positive things done.
That is the kind of thing that drives people off. It doesn't matter whether you have constructed an elitist leadership or not. If people perceive it to be elitist because of its actions, or not following its own rules, then it might as well be elitist by design.
I would challenge every single Founder, BoG and EC member to this......walk a mile as an DD, ATM, or TA for 60 days in the VATSIM of 2010. Not just observing it......take the position, own it, see what it is like to navigate the waters of dealing with problem members, frivolous complaints, moving targets, unknown rules, thin instruction staffing, transfers, inactives, making up meanings for ratings, trying to determine the intent of a policy, getting your own policies approved, and a thick bureaucracy of people telling you all the things you can't do, but never trying to help you figure out what you can do.
But the number 1 thing to start with is this: The membership and staff of an organization is reflective of its leadership. When the leadership acts dismissive, sarcastic, or rudely......well you get the picture.
my .02
