As someone who does this for a living and is mostly just a casual, and curious, observer (aside from flying on the network every so often), my advice is be whatever controller you want to be to the extent allowed by VATSIM rules.
You set foot into the center I work at and you will hear three types of controllers:
Controller 1 who is no nonsense, concise all the time, and in my opinion, sounds a bit cold on frequency but they do the job well and by the book and at the end of the day, you can't expect more. Nothing wrong with Controller 1.
Controller 2 is me. This controller understands when you can be a bit more "loose" and have some fun with the pilots.
For example, I was working today and it wasn't too busy...routine stuff. Cleared an EDV direct to a fix, pilot reads it back only to advise 30 seconds later they accidentally went direct to the wrong fix and asked if I could spell the original one. Knowing the fix they went direct to wouldn't be a problem, my response, "Sir, I'm not the best speller, you can stay direct ABCDE." They got a chuckle, I got a chuckle, I helped them out, the job got done and we had fun.
Or another time when an AAL pilot and I had about a five minute long conversation on a dead frequency about how he used to know a guy at the center 20 years ago and I told him I was only 5 years old then.
There is a time and place for conversations and straying from phraseology. If you can understand that, have at it.
Controller 3...don't be controller 3. This controller over-complicates things regardless of traffic levels when they have no business doing so. When you have time to have some fun or go into detailed explanations/requests with pilots, great, no problem. When you don't, you just throw yourself and the sector down the tubes. Don't be controller 3.