Just to clarify... It is indeed the pilot's responsibility... And solely the pilot's responsibility. That said, and I think what folks are portraying here, most controllers like to reach out to play nice in the sandbox. Nice in the sandbox is good. Mark and Chris and others in this thread that are looking out for the best interests of all, including teaching the pilots, are definitely on the right track.
But I still hate the .contactme. It's a crutch.
I've said it a million times before. I'm not a fan of the .contactme. It is unrealistic. Another pilot responsibility is to be monitoring unicom at all times when in uncontrolled airspace. So assuming a pilot doesn't realize he entered controlled airspace, that's the way I reach out. It emulates a controller reaching out to a pilot on guard (121.5) which happens all day long RW. When I log on and see that there are people in my airspace that may not be aware that I just logged on, is send a text message on unicom that says something to the effect of: "XXX_CTR is now online, 1xx.xxx" This gets, on average, about 65% of the pilots out there who are dutifully monitoring unicom to call me.
The others, I generally send another message, on unicom, directed at their callsign, that says Contact XXX_CTR on 1xx.xxx For those controllers/Facility Engineers that choose to add it to their facility's standard alias file, it could look like
.cme Contact $callsign on $com1
I use the .contactme as a last resort. It it the least realistic (the hailing attempts on unicom mirror what the RW would do on guard), but sends a clear message. By the time I've sent the third request for contact, the pilot has now neglected their responsibility to monitor for online ATC and contact ATC for a decent number of minutes (I usually don't send .contactme messages for at least 15 minutes, unless there is a traffic conflict brewing) (and their situational awareness tools (e.g. VATSpy, Servinfo, etc.) should have updated, showing online ATC), and have also neglected their responsibility to monitor unicom. In my estimation (because I stopped collecting hard data months ago), when I've been online for 15+ minutes and start to send the .contactme messages, 80+% of pilots aren't paying attention, and fewer than 20% are newbie-ish that need some assistance/reassurance.
I would wager that the vast majority of controllers on VATSIM just rely on the .contactme crutch right out of the chute, most likely because that's the way they were taught. That's also likely why we hear a lot of pilots say, "Oh, I was just waiting for the .contactme message; everyone else does that...." That's true in Europe. I hope to hell we are not training our controllers to use the .contactme message as a crutch, but as a last resort. Please stop propagating anything along the lines of "if a pilot wanders into your controlled airspace, immediately send a .contactme" or "pilots should wait for a .contactme". It is the pilot's responsibility to contact ATC, not ATC's responsibility to contact the pilots (reference the VATSIM Code of Conduct, section B3). Much has been written about this over the years, with the main argument that pilots have only one controller to contact, while controllers may be working several, indeed a lot of, aircraft, working multiple approaches and terminal operations at multiple airports.
Stop feeding the pilots fish; teach them how to fish! Just please do it in a kind, helpful and respectful manner. Otherwise, we'll have a different problem on our hands.
Too harsh and we lose people. Too loose and we lose people. That sweet spot in the middle where everyone gets better/smarter and has more fun is a tough place to find, but a great place to be. Let's all look for that sweet spot that maximizes the enjoyment of the network for everyone....